thanks – Archive

benetnash:

He doesn’t remember inviting me to his house and begging me to be his coach. He doesn’t remember dancing with me and grinding on my four thousand dollar suit in a room full of stuffy uptight strangers and sweeping me off my feet and spraying himself in champagne while standing on Chris’ powerful inner thighs for the camera. We had such a good night I thought we really connected and all this time that he has been thinking the first time we spoke was when I showed up to his house unannounced with all of my stuff and my dog. I was throwing myself at him. I wanted him to see I could be fun and sexy too. I thought the reason he never tried to contact me after that was because he realized what a boring prude I am. Oh my god he probably thought I was a creep. Oh my GOD he probably thought I was some kind of fake flirty airhead. And a gross pervert for making him dance Eros. How did he not throw me out? And I was so pissed when he kept turning me down after everything at the banquet. He acted like he had never spoken to me before because he thought he HADN’T. And I was too embarrassed to ask what made him change his mind about me. This is unbelievable. I’m an idiot. I’m a huge idiot. But I’m an idiot wearing his ring somehow. Fuck.